What makes a great parent?
A good parent is a person who strives to make decisions in the most effective interest of the child.
What can make a great parent is not just defined by the parent 's actions, but additionally their intention.
A great parent doesn't need to be perfect. No one is perfect. No kid is perfect either … keeping this in your mind is important when we set our expectations.
Profitable parenting is not about achieving perfection. Though it doesn't mean that we should not work towards that goal. Set high standards for ourselves then and first our children second. We function as important role models for them.
Top 10 Parenting Tips
Here are 10 tips that will help you be an even better parent, learn effective parenting skills, and avoid bad parenting.
Not all of them are that easy.
It is not likely that any person is able to do them all the time.
Nevertheless, even in case you only do a component of these tips in this parenting guide, you will be moving in the right direction if you keep working on them.
#1 BE A good Role MODEL
Walk the walk. Don't just tell your child what you want them to do.
The best way to teach is showing them.
Human is an unique species in part because we can learn by imitation. We're programmed to copy others' actions, comprehend them, and incorporate them into our own. Children, in particular, watch everything their parents do very thoroughly.
Thus, function as the individual you would like your child to be - respect your child, show them good behavior and attitude, have empathy towards your kid's emotion - as well as your kid will follow suit.
#2: Love THEM And Show them Through ACTION
Show your love.
There's simply no such thing as loving the child of yours too much. Loving them can't spoil them.
Just what you choose to do (or give) in the name of love can - things as material indulgence, low expectation, leniency, and over-protection. When these things are provided in place of love that is real, that's when you'll have a spoiled kid.
To love your child may be as easy as giving them hugs, spending quality time with them, having family meals together, and hearing your child's problems seriously.
Showing these acts of love is able to trigger the release of feel-good hormones like oxytocin. These neurochemicals can provide us a full sense of calm, emotional warmth, and contentment; from these, the kid, will develop resilience and never to mention a closer connection with you.
#3: Practice Kind And Firm POSITIVE PARENTING
Babies are born with around 100 billion brain cells (neurons) with comparatively few connections. These connections create our thoughts, drive the actions of ours, shape the personalities of ours, and basically determine who we're. They are "sculpted", strengthened, and created through life experiences.
Give the child of yours positive family interaction, especially in the beginning years. They will then be equipped to experience positive experiences themselves and also offer them to others.
But if you give the child of yours negative experiences, they will not have the kind of development needed for them to thrive.
Sing that silly song. Have a tickle marathon. Go on the park. Laugh with your child. Allow them to have positive attention. Drive through an emotional tantrum with them. Solve an issue together with a positive attitude.
These positive experiences produce good neural connections into your child's brain and form the memories individuals your child carries for life.
With regards to discipline, it seems difficult to remain positive, particularly when dealing with behavior problems. But it's possible by using positive discipline and avoiding harsh discipline.
Being a great parent means you need to teach your child the morals of what's right and what is wrong.
Setting limits and being consistent will be the golden rule to good discipline. Be firm and kind whenever you set rules and implement them. Focus on the reason for the child's misbehavior. And allow it to be an opportunity for them to find out for the future in a good manner, instead of to get punished for the past.
#4: Be a Safe HAVEN FOR YOUR CHILD
Tey letting the child of yours realize that you will always be there for them if it is responsive to your child's signals and sensitive to the needs of theirs. Support and accept the child of yours as an individual. Be a warm and safe place for your child to explore from and return to.
Kids raised by parents who are consistently responsive have much better emotional regulation development, social skills development, and emotional health outcomes.
#5: Talk with The CHILD of yours And Help THEIR BRAINS INTEGRATE
Most of us know already the importance of communication. Talk to your child as well as listen to them thoroughly. By keeping an open line of communication, you'll have a much better connection with the child of yours as well as your kid may come to you when there's a problem.
But there is an additional reason for communication. You help your kid integrate various parts of the brain of theirs, a crucial process in a child's development.
Integration is similar to our body, in which different organs must coordinate and work in concert to have a trully healthy body. When various regions of the brain are integrated, they can function harmoniously as a whole, meaning fewer tantrums, more good behavior, much more empathy, and much better psychological well-being.
To do that, talk through troubling experiences. Ask your child to explain what happened and the way they felt to develop attuned communication.
You don't have to offer solutions. You do not need to have all the answers to become a good parent. Just listening to them talk. Ask clarifying questions using words that are simple will help them make sense of their experiences and integrate the memories of theirs.
#6: Reflect on Your own personal CHILDHOOD
A lot of us want to parent differently from the parents of ours. Even those who had a good upbringing and a thankful childhood might wish to alter several elements of the way they had been brought up.
But very frequently, when we open our mouths, we speak just like our own parents did.
Reflecting on our own childhood is an action towards understanding the reason we parent how we do. Make note of things you'd like changing and think of just how you would get it done differently in a genuine scenario. Attempt to be aware and change the behavior of yours the next time those issues come up.
Don't give up in case you don't succeed in the beginning. It will take practice, a lot of practice to consciously change one 's child-rearing strategies.
#7: Focus on Your own WELL-BEING
Parents require relief also.
Pay attention to your own well being to https://parentinghowto.com/ avoid parental burnout.
Oftentimes, things such as the own needs of yours or the overall health of your marriage are kept on the back burner when a kid is born. If you do not pay attention to them, they will become bigger issues down the road. Take time to enhance the relationship of yours with your spouse.
Stressed-out parents tend to be more prone to fighting. Don't hesitate to ask for parenting assistance. Having some "me time" for self care and stress management is important to revitalize the mind.
How parents take proper care of their child physically and mentally can make a big difference in the parenting of theirs and family life. If these two areas fail, your child is going to suffer, also.
#8: Don't SPANK, NO MATTER WHAT
No doubt, for some parents, spanking is able to result in short-term compliance which occasionally is a much-needed help for the parents.
However, this method does not teach the kid right from wrong. It only teaches the kid to fear external consequences. The kid will be motivated to avoid getting caught with behavior that is inappropriate.
Spanking your child is modeling to the child that he/she can resolve issues by violence. A child who's spanked, smacked, or hit is much more vulnerable to fighting with other children. They're more likely in order to become bullies and to use verbal/physical aggression to solve disputes.
Later on in daily life, they are also far more apt to result in oppositional behavior and delinquency, worse parent-child human relationships, mental health issues, along with domestic violence victims or even abusers.
You will find an assortment of better options to discipline which have been proven to be more effective, like good discipline (Tip #3 above ) and positive reinforcement.
#9: Keep Things In Perspective And remember YOUR PARENTING GOAL
What is the goal of yours in increasing a kid?
If you're like most parents, you want the child of yours to excel in college, be prosperous, be responsible and independent, be respectful, enjoy positive relationships with you and some, be to care and compassionate, plus have a happy, healthy and also satisfying life.
Though just how much time do you spend working towards those goals?
When you're like most parents, you probably spend most of the time just trying to get through the day. As authors, Bryson and Siegel, point out in the book of theirs, The Whole Brain kid, rather than helping your kid thrive, spent most of time simply attempting to survive!
To not allow the survival mode dominate the life of yours, the next time you're feeling frustrated or angry, step back. Consider what frustration and anger can do for you or the child of yours.
Rather, find ways to turn every negative experience into a learning opportunity for them. Even epic tantrums could be transformed into priceless brain sculpting moments in case you focus on teaching your child, not trying to control them.
#10: Take a SHORTCUT By utilizing Findings In Latest PSYCHOLOGY And NEUROSCIENCE RESEARCH
By shortcuts, I do not mean shortchanging the child of yours with tricks. What I mean is taking advantage of what is already known by scientists.
Parenting is among the most researched fields in psychology. Lots of parenting strategies, traditions, or practices have been scientifically researched, verified, refined, or refuted.
For optimum parenting advice for increasing a child and information which are supported by science, here is one of my personal favorite science based parenting books, The Science of Parenting.
Using medical knowledge is of course not really a one-size-fits-all strategy. Every child is different. Quite possibly within the best parenting style, there can be many different good parenting methods you can choose according to your child's temperament.
A very good example is employing spanking to discipline. There are numerous better alternatives, time-in, reasoning, e.g. redirection, etc. You can choose a non punitive discipline method that actually works best for your child.
Naturally, you can also decide to use "traditional" or maybe "old school" parenting styles (e.g. punishing or spanking) and also might still buy a "similar" outcome.
Differential susceptibility has shown us that kids with different temperaments respond to the quality of parenting differently.
Those people who are more susceptible to parenting quality is going to have better outcomes under great parenting but worse outcomes under poor parenting.
Those who are much less susceptible may "turn out fine" regardless of how tough their parents treat them. Though it doesn't imply those practices are good. These children are merely lucky. They could thrive despite bad parenting, not due to it.
Why take a possibility with sub-par parenting practices if you can use well-researched, better ones?
The value of parenting cannot be underestimated. Taking science based parental advice may not be the easiest way to parent. It might require more work on the part of yours in the short term but can help you save lots of agony and time in the long run.
Final Thoughts On Parenting
The great thing is, that although parenting is hard, it's also really rewarding. The bad part will be the rewards usually come later than the effort. But if we try our best today, we'll eventually reap the rewards and also have absolutely nothing to regret.
To Happy Parenting!